Wednesday, June 07, 2006
where is it?
This painting no longer exists. Well, it exsists, but under more layers of paint, as is my habit. I was working on it yesterday in a state of sleep deprivation and was feeling that I'd lost it. I was feeling lost with where it was and where it might be going. Of course I can never tell where any painting will end up, but looking at where it had been and where it'd brought it, I felt like I'd missed a moment where I could have left it alone and it would have been fine.
Viewing it yesterday after an hour of adding more and more layers of grid structures, I felt like I was staring at the biggest mess and tangle of ideas. It was one of those, "what the fuck am I doing with this?" moments. I had to leave the studio to run an errand, and it was a good time to get away from it.
I returned to the studio maybe 20 minutes later and decided to leave it for the next time I'm there, which will be today. It's a good thing I had to go to work. There's no telling what I would have done with it if I had the time to stay and work on it some more then.
It's a good thing that I'm used to times like these and know how to handle them. I will admit that I can become very emotionally and mentally engaged with a piece and when I feel that things are going south, it can get very annoying. When it happens, I'll usually just go and do something else, take a break, or sometimes, just plow through and see what happens. It just depends on what state of mind I'm in.